I bring him coffee y'all
I put so much about me and my husband on social media that if I wasn’t me, I would be thinking, “That heffa aint that happy. She just doing all that stuff for likes”. But I am me. I know that this is not just a polished pre-packaged made for tv version of a woman in her fifties in love. This really is a love story. Now again if I wasn’t me, I would say that this dude probably done found some desperate old lady and she on social media making a fool of herself. But, again, I am me. This is real. And I never saw it coming.
The reason why I share so much about my relationship is that our society has a very clear message to women of a certain age. You are past your prime. We don’t want to see you. We don’t want to talk to you or about you. You are divorced therefore you are deficient in some way. You are plus sized, you are loud. So, please stay in the background and try your best not to stand out in any way. We need you to watch the children of the ones who are still in their prime. We need you to be silent. You had your chance. Go sit down. Now.
I share our love story for every woman who refused to accept just any old crumbs that society and men and our children would throw our way. I share for every woman who has gotten tired of being alone and is just about to lower her standards and accept some crumby mess. I share our love story for every woman who has compromised and regretted it. I share this story because you really can’t hurry love. Oh no. You just have to wait.
The story of us getting back together as told by Tyanna West (Public Historian), can be viewed here
I didn’t want to talk about it with anybody (still don’t like to actually) because I didn’t want to have to deal with questions that I don’t have answers for. I don’t really know why I made the choices that I made back then. I was coming off of back-to-back severe traumas with no understanding of how to process either one. I was barely 21 years old when I found out I was pregnant. I was as confused and disoriented as I was my first day of high school. One thing I love about my brain is that it can block from my memory those things which would create cognitive dissonance in my soul. I am grateful for that Superpower.
Anyhoo…I said all of that to say, that I will write here the thoughts and fears and joys and pains of being in love and a newlywed over the age of 50, dang near 60. But I am in love y’all. I’m talking heart skip a beat, daydreaming, melting at the sound of his voice in love. I want to share it with you because I want you to know that if it happened to me it can happen to anybody.
Welcome to the story of the “Oldlyweds”